“Just Friends”

Tonight was lovely and altogether terrible at the same time.

It was wonderful because I spent it with you.

It was horrible because there was never a clearer moment to me that your feelings didn’t match mine.

If I ever wondered what your feelings were towards me, tonight they were confirmed. And that is, you see me as nothing more than a friend. I may be attractive, funny, and compatible with you, but there’s nothing more there.

I think it was confirmed in our goodbye. We had a quick loose hug, and you mentioned that you, me, and some other friends should all hang out sometime.

To be completely honest, I could care less about the other people. I really only want to spend time with you. But I keep my mouth shut.

It hurts. Really hurts. After our goodbye, I wanted to cry. I spent so much time getting ready and preparing for the evening, and I looked beautiful. But even so, you don’t think of me in that way. I guess a nice dress and some makeup can’t make up for a lack of attraction.

Do you even notice my feelings? Or are you oblivious to them because I’m not even on your radar?

I wonder, I wonder…

I don’t think anything good could come from this, I’ll probably just end up hurting myself more. But I can’t help it. I enjoy spending time with you, talking to you, laughing with you, smiling at you. I simply enjoy looking at you.

It seems so ridiculous that I want something that will only hurt me. That I want someone I can’t have.

But it’s the way it is.

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12 Responses to “Just Friends”

  1. regina5000 says:

    OMG! I´m so sorry. 😮

    • Thanks Anna. Just the way it is unfortunately :/ maybe someday his feelings will change (probably unlikely though). More likely that I’ll have to get over him. We will see how that goes. Hope you are doing well!

      • regina5000 says:

        Well, things happen for make us learn and have more experiences. Don´t be sad, there´s a lot more fishes in the ocean. Or maybe he will feel the same for you soon, In this life everything could happen. 😉 Regards.

  2. braixetta says:

    That’s so sad… I feel so bad for you. I feel like love is just something to break out hearts, I’m just so sorry for you. I hope someday you will find someone you love that will love you back. So how is it now? Do you love him still? I hope you find somebody soon… 😧💦😫😖😭😰💔💔💔

    • Thanks Braixetta. Yeah, I still like him, I can’t help it. But now that I really know what his feelings are, I think I’ll be able to move on in a little bit. Right now I’m just gonna enjoy his company and hang out with him with a group of friends I guess. I know that I will find “my one” eventually, and I’m in no rush, just kinda disappointed things with this guy didn’t work out :/

      Hoping you’re having a good day! Thanks for reading and commenting.

  3. charlypriest says:

    He doesn´t seem to me to be such a bad guy, at least he didn´t blow you off in a mean manner. He did say to be friends and hang out. Love has different shapes and forms, the guy lost that type of love of girlfriend boyfriend but you say he doesn´t consider your feelings my guess from what you wrote is that yes he does since he did say to hang out as friends, and having friends is another type of love. That hurts you, I´m sure. But there a lot of fish in the water, male fish that is. Plus you can´t change people or their feeling towards you, the only control you have over anybody is over you and only you. So keep on with the dancing meeting guys, prioritise things and then focus on them, like your writing and songs. I sound like Dr. Phil….. and I´m not even charging!

    • Hahahah thanks Dr. Charly 😉

      Yeah it’s infuriating sometimes. I’ll be flirting with him and it will go way over his head. He won’t acknowledge it or even notice it! I’m completely friend-zoned.

      It’s not that he’s a mean person or anything, it’s just hard for me to take. You think that if two people get along and are decently attractive, they’d hit it off. I kind of wonder what we would be like if we weren’t friends and just went on a date together. Somehow it seems easier for something to happen out of that.

      Will keep writing, singing, and dancing! Not sure how long it will take me to get over this guy. I keep wondering if someday he will get it and change his mind :/ Probably not anytime soon though.

      • charlypriest says:

        Dr. Phil in the house!!

        I wouldn´t get to hang up on him and waiting, seems like a waste of time. Plus you girls if you can´t live without him and are about to throw yourself from a 20 story apartment, or you try to get run over by a car, or horse both can do the job, anyways, if it´s that much you girls can always play hard to get, make him a little jealous with some other guy. I volunteer to be the other guy, no problem, I´m like fast food easy to get, fun time to be around for a while and quickly disposable. But yeah, you girls have quite some tricks, and if he falls for it, as a guy I will say he´s dummy, but as Dr. Phil I´ll say good for you! Sometimes a bit of manipulation is the game in some situation.

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